Seven Wives and Seven Prisons Or Experiences in the Life of a Matrimonial Monomaniac

This work the author claims is indeed a true story of how he happened to be married seven times to seven different women and the rollicking, hilarious events that led (or stumbled) to the marriages and the ah--disassembling/failing/failures of each said marriage which happened oftentimes to land him in prison. The summarist finds the work a very tongue-in-cheek diatribe/lament/account of his obsessive zeal in 'marrying the right one', but is also the mirthful chronicle of said author's very unconventional adventures.

By : L. A. Abbott

Chapter 01



Chapter 02



Chapter 03



Chapter 04



Chapter 05



Chapter 06



Chapter 07



Chapter 08



Chapter 09



Chapter 10



Chapter 11



Chapter 12



Chapter 13



Chapter 14



Chapter 15


CHAPTER 1. THE FIRST AND WORST WIFE My Early History. The First
Marriage. Leaving Home to Prospect. Sending for My Wife. Her Mysterious
Journey. Where I Found Her. Ten Dollars for Nothing. A Fascinating Hotel
Clerk. My Wife’s Confession. From Bad to Worse. Final Separation. Trial
for Forgery. A Private Marriage. Summary Separation.

CHAPTER II. MISERIES FROM MY SECOND MARRIAGE. Love-Making in
Massachusetts. Arrest for Bigamy. Trial at Northampton. A Stunning
Sentence. Sent to State Prison. Learning the Brush Business. Sharpening
Picks. Prison Fare. In the Hospital. Kind Treatment. Successful
Horse-Shoeing. The Warden my Friend. Efforts for my Release. A Full
Pardon.

CHAPTER III. THE SCHEIMER SENSATION. The Scheimer Family. In Love
With Sarah. Attempt to Elope. How it was Prevented. Second Attempt. A
Midnight Expedition. The Alarm. A Frightful Beating. Escape, Flogging
the Devil out of Sarah. Return to New Jersey. “Boston Yankee.” Plans to
Secure Sarah.

CHAPTER IV. SUCCESS WITH SARAH. Mary Smith as a Confederate. The Plot.
Waiting in the Woods. The Spy Outwitted. Sarah Secured. The Pursuers
Baffled. Night on the Road. Efforts to Get Married. “The Old Offender.”
Married at Last. A Constable after Sarah. He Gives it Up. An Ale Orgie.
Return to “Boston Yankee’s.” A Home in Goshen.

CHAPTER V. HOW THE SCHEIMERS MADE ME SUFFER. Return to Scheimer’s.
Peace, and then Pandemonium. Frightful Family Row. Running for Refuge.
The Gang Again. Arrest at Midnight. Struggle with my Captors. In Jail
Once More. Put in Irons. A Horrible Prison. Breaking Out. The Dungeon.
Sarah’s Baby.. Curious Compromises. Old Scheimer my Jailer. Signing a
Bond. Free Again. Last Words from Sarah.

CHAPTER VI. FREE LIFE AND FISHING. Taking Care of Crazy Men. Carrying
off a Boy. Arrested for Stealing my Own Horse and Buggy. Fishing in Lake
Winnepisiogee. An Odd Landlord. A Woman as Big as a Hogshead. Reducing
the Hogshead to a Barrel. Wonderful Verification of a Dream. Successful
Medical Practice. A Busy Winter in New Hampshire. Blandishments of
Captain Brown. I go to Newark, New Jersey.

CHAPTER VII. WEDDING A WIDOW AND THE CONSEQUENCES. I Marry a Widow.
Six Weeks of Happiness. Confiding a Secret, and the Consequences. The
Widow’s Brother. Sudden Flight from Newark. In Hartford, Conn. My
Wife’s Sister Betrays Me. Trial for Bigamy. Sentenced to Ten Years’
Imprisonment. I Become a “Bobbin Boy.” A Good Friend. Governor Price
Visits me in Prison. He Pardons Me. Ten Years’ Sentence Fulfilled in
Seven Months.

CHAPTER VIII. ON THE KEEN SCENT. Good Resolutions. Enjoying Freedom.
Going After a Crazy Man. The Old Tempter in a New Form. Mary Gordon.
My New “Cousin.” Engaged Again. Visit to the Old Folks at Home. Another
Marriage. Starting for Ohio. Change of Plans. Domestic Quarrels.
Unpleasant Stories about Mary. Bound Over to Keep the Peace. Another
Arrest for Bigamy. A Sudden Flight. Secreted Three Weeks in a Farm
House. Recaptured at Concord. Escaped Once More. Traveling on the
Underground Railroad. In Canada.

CHAPTER IX. MARRYING TWO MILLINERS. Back in Vermont. Fresh Temptations.
Margaret Bradley. Wine and Women. A Mock Marriage in Troy. The False
Certificate. Medicine and Millinery. Eliza Gurnsey. A Spree at Saratoga.
Marrying Another Milliner. Again Arrested for Bigamy. In Jail Eleven
Months. A Tedious Trial. Found Guilty. Appeal to Supreme Court. Trying
to Break Out of Jail. A Governor’s Promise. Second Trial. Sentenced to
Three Years’ Imprisonment.

CHAPTER X. PRISON LIFE IN VERMONT. Entering Prison. The Scythe Snath
Business. Blistered Hands. I Learn Nothing. Threaten to Kill the Shop
Keeper. Locksmithing. Open Rebellion. Six Weeks in the Dungeon. Escape
of a Prisoner. In the Dungeon Again. The Mad Man Hall. He Attempts
to Murder the Deputy. I Save Morey’s Life. Howling in the Black Hole.
Taking Off Hall’s Irons. A Ghastly Spectacle. A Prison Funeral. I am Let
Alone. The Full Term of my Imprisonment.

CHAPTER XI. ON THE TRAMP. The Day of my Deliverance. Out of Clothes.
Sharing with a Beggar. A Good Friend. Tramping Through the Snow. Weary
Walks. Trusting to Luck. Comfort at Concord. At Meredith Bridge. The
Blaisdells. Last of the “Blossom” Business. Making Money at Portsmouth.
Revisiting Windsor. An Astonished Warden. Making Friends of Enemies.
Inspecting the Prison. Going to Port Jervis.

CHAPTER XII. ATTEMPT TO KIDNAP SARAH SCHEIMER’S BOY. Starting to See
Sarah. The Long Separation. What I Learned About Her. Her Drunken
Husband. Change of Plan. A Suddenly-Formed Scheme. I Find Sarah’s Son.
The First Interview. Resolve to Kidnap the Boy. Remonstrance of my Son
Henry. The Attempt. A Desperate Struggle. The Rescue. Arrest of Henry.
My Flight into Pennsylvania. Sending Assistance to my Son. Return to
Port Jervis. Bailing Henry. His Return to Belvidere. He is Bound Over to
be Tried for Kidnapping. My folly.

CHAPTER XIII. ANOTHER WIDOW. Waiting for the Verdict. My Son Sent to
State Prison. What Sarah Would Have Done. Interview with my First Wife.
Help for Henry. The Biddeford Widow. Her Effort to Marry Me. Our Visit
to Boston. A Warning. A Generous Gift. Henry Pardoned. Close of the
Scheimer Account. Visit to Ontario County. My Rich Cousins. What Might
Have Been. My Birthplace Revisited.

CHAPTER XIV. MY SON TRIES TO MURDER ME. Settling Down in Maine. Henry’s
Health. Tour Through the South. Secession Times. December in New
Orleans. Up the Mississippi. Leaving Henry in Massachusetts. Back in
Maine Again. Return to Boston, Profitable Horse-Trading. Plenty of
Money. My First Wife’s Children. How they Have Been Brought Up. A
Barefaced Robbery. Attempt to Blackmail Me. My Son Tries to Rob and Kill
Me. My Rescue Last of the Young Man.

CHAPTER XV. A TRUE WIFE AND HOME AT LAST. Where Were All my Wives? Sense
of Security. An Imprudent Acquaintance. Moving from Maine. My Property
in Rensselaer County. How I Lived. Selling a Recipe. About Buying a
Carpet. Nineteen Lawsuits. Sudden Departure for the West. A Vagabond
Life for Two Years. Life in California. Return to the East. Divorce from
any First Wife. A Genuine Marriage. My Farm. Home at Last.

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